May 13, 2018

Mother’s Day is a happy day for me.  We have four children, 23 grandchildren (counting five marriages as adding to our family) and three and one-third great-grandchildren. They are good people, responsible, kind to others, productive in society. Also, I love them just because they are wonderful.

I got an invitation to a double shower today. My grandson Dallin will marry Cheyenne soon, and my daughter-in-law’s sister’s son will marry even sooner. The mothers are holding a party for the brides. They are lovely young women in every way. How can I explain how much I love the whole Day family from which Becky, Eric’s wife, and Melissa, her sister sprang? We met today at Eric’s for a Mother’s Day feast, and every one of the people there was just plain lovable, especially the brides coming into the family.

Another grand-daughter, Lauren, showed me her “Promise Ring.”  I was very touched at this old-fashioned custom. She and Keenan feel they should wait to get married until he is out of school and has a good job.  That used to be the way couples behaved when parents could not support them or provide housing. The young man and young woman, not yet ready for marriage, would promise to become engaged and marry when they were ready to start a family. The intention is that they will remain chaste until marriage.

In this era of co-habitation and serial link-ups, the sincerity and good intentions of these two young people warm my heart. They are attractive, somewhat quiet, sincere, and have the approval of parents. They want to behave responsibly and make a good and solid life for themselves and future children.

Some people will be saying that they don’t believe that young people in their early twenties can actually wait such a long time with these goals. Some people may think it foolish not to just cohabitate if they love one another. Some people may predict that they will fail in their goals because of the pressure. The number of “Promise Rings” I saw when I googled them tells me that nowadays the ring means they are living together and hope to marry at some time.

But this couple’s idea is so unusual in this modern age that I really hope they can follow their sensible plan. Promise-keeping for a long time before marriage used to be fairly common. A man might go to India or South America to make his fortune. In our Mormon society, a couple might promise to be faithful while the young man spent three years abroad on a proselyting mission. Such arrangements are the stuff of many novels I have read. Perhaps that’s why I feel that Lauren and Keenan, following the religious standards of sexual morality they have been taught, are going to need all the patience and faith possible. I hope that these sweet hopes and dreams can come true. And if something gives, then we’ll cope. I admire their high ideals. PMA


Published by seedofgalaxies

I see complexities in everything and believe through experience that there is indeed "opposition in all things," or, in other words, yin and yang, that little symbol of white and black with an eye of each in the substance of the other represents life as I know it. So I write weekly essays about what I find. As a writer, I have published articles, poetry, and hymn texts. I have a couple of historical novels in the works. I wrote the texts to two hymns in the LDS Hymnbook, "Let the Holy Sprit Guide" and "With Songs of Praise." I'm an enthusiastic member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. As the wife of Gary L Allen, we have four children, three of whom have many children. A gardener, Cub Scout Den Leader, and conscientious exerciser, as body and resources allowed, I've walked, moved to group exercise to music, tap danced for a while, then loved yoga for about 25 years. I have been an English teacher at BYU. Gary and I spent a year (2004-5) in China teaching English at a Qingdao University. Later we spent 18 months in the Seattle area on a CES and proselyting mission. To retain my claim to be a writer, I write a weekly essay almost every Sunday. A companion publication with this blog is "Penny's Shards," a large number of very short short stories.

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